Announcing the June 2013 Giveaway!!!

We have new giveaway starting now! It will run until June 30, 2013 at 11:59PM Central.

The goal: to get 300 likes on our Facebook page before the giveaway expires.

The prize:

How to enter?? Visit the page at the top labeled "June 2013 Giveaway" and fill out the entry form!

If we reach 300 likes, one lucky entrant will be randomly selected to receive this beautiful necklace!

Want to increase your odds???? Make sure to like us on Facebook and follow the blog!

New Writers!

We have officially added three new bloggers! If you haven't checked them out yet, please do!

You can find more info in posts below or under the "Authors" tab.

At this point we aren't going to add any more bloggers.

I will make an exception for a male blogger to join though! I'm still trying to convince my husband to write a guest post... LoL!

Thanks for reading us! Spread the word!

And The Winner Is....

Chelsea Spraberry!!!

Chelsea,
I have sent you a private message with further directions!

Thank you everyone for following our page. I hope we gain more followers as word of our blog spreads. We are always looking for more voices to add too!

You Guys Are Awesome!

We have officially gotten over 25 followers!

That means.... A drawing for the PCOS bracelets!!!

We will draw a name tomorrow afternoon, at 3 pm, so be sure to check back to see who won!!!

You guys are awesome and if you know anybody else that wants to follow us, they have until tomorrow to do so and still be in the drawing!

Oh! I Almost Forgot!

You can also "pin" us onto Pinterest!!! You can do the blog in it's entirety OR you can view individual posts by clicking the title and pinning those!!!

There is a "PinIt" button next the the "Like" button on the upper left!

Thanks guys!

Like us?? Show us!

 

Thank you guys for reading our blog! It is nice to know that we are reaching people and hopefully comforting some of you :o)

Don't forget, we are always looking for guests to post their stories!

AND...

PLEASE "LIKE" us on Facebook and "FOLLOW" us on this blog!!!

We want to make sure you get the latest updates as quick as possible!

Silent Blogger

When starting this blog with a few friends, I had initially intended to be an informer of PCOS and infertility but didn't know when I would be doing fertility treatments myself. DH and I had decided we would wait til Aug 2012 and go from there on what we wanted to do. Either wait 2 more years until nursing school was over or just steam ahead.

Sometimes other people's decisions affect our own.

As we all know, Mother's Day was last weekend (sorry for the reminder!). Saturday evening the night before, I FINALLY heard back from the nursing school I applied to. I was rejected for the Fall 2012 semester start. Just what I wanted to hear on that weekend, as though it wasn't bad enough.

I didn't know how to react to that. I had expected it, deep down, but still hopeful. Kinda like how I feel whenever I do fertility treatments. Didn't expect it to work but hoped it would.

DH reassured me that everything was ok and this and that. They next morning he picked his words carefully and explained that he viewed it as a sign. Postponing school with no choice, his mom moving out (which isn't happening now...), and summer coming so his second job wouldn't be as stressful was like the pieces coming together. We need to focus on building our family.

So, Monday morning I called my previous OB doctor that also does minor infertility treatments and set an appointment. I expected the standard 2-3 month wait like the first time I went. Imagine my surprise when they said I could be in on THURSDAY!

The days passed and I got giddy and nervous and finally I was at her office.

She is a nice doctor. The only way I can describe her is that she is very professional and sometimes that makes me feel awkward because she doesn't tend to small talk or converse unless promoted, especially if she is entering notes on the laptop (they have a computer file system there). Me, being the socially awkward person in an awkward 1-on-1 situation provided plenty of small talk hoping to make both of us relax and she talked a little more... Anywho...

We discussed my options and she agreed that we would start clomid 50 mg once this cycle of BC was done. Luckily I had decided to start taking it back in January so that ended up cutting off three months of wait time. She also sent a prescription for metformin since it tends to help the clomid out.

I'm excited. AF should start in a week and we will go from there.

How do I feel about all this? Excited. BUT I don't think it will work. I'm hopeful that it will but don't  think it is probable. I guess I'd rather expect the worse so the letdown isn't as hard. We shall see :)

OH! And my insurance doesn't cover ANY infertility, not even clomid so the breakdown:
CVS Pharmacy
Clomid $19.09 for 5 pills (50 mg each) which breaks down to $3.818 per pill
Metformin $1.30 for 1 month (covered by insurance)

Last time we went through this (Spring 2009) Clomid was $18 a pill and generic was $1.80 (Walmart). We decided to just go ahead and splurge on brand name this time :)

Disappointment to the Infertility Community

I feel like a disappointment to our community in the lack of information on NIAW.

It has been incredibly busy in all our households but here are the links I wanted to share with you. Luckily, MSN decided to mention NIAW... for one day.

Invisible Pain of Infertility

What NOT to Say to an Infertile

8 Fertility Misconceptions

9 Natural Fertility Boosters

Fertility Awareness Stamps

My goal is to take each one of these links and discuss them... I hope I find the time!

Spread the Word!

I know we are a little blog so any help that you can give to spread the word about us would be great!!!!

You can now "Pin" us on Pintrest AND you can "Like & Share" us on Facebook! We also have a Facebook page as well!

Hope you like the blog and our stories! Spread the word about us!

If you would like to write a guest post, please let us know!

Timing Timing Timing

For the last several months I have been thinking about when we will try again for a baby.

Originally we decided to wait until I started nursing school, based on the hope that it would be the Spring or Fall 2012 semester.

We made that decision a while ago, when I had initially planned on applying in Aug/Sept 2011 for the Spring 2012 start. I ended up not being able to apply because I couldn't take the entry test due to all the dates being full.

In the meantime I took additional classes like medical terminology and a certified nursing assistant course. I just finished the CNA course on March 1st (as valedictorian!) and submitted my nursing application for the Fall 2012 start on February 27th.

I was annoyed at that additional delay. Then I started thinking... Always a bad thing.

Nursing school is 2 years long. I have a feeling, deep in my gut, that if I am accepted for the Fall 2012 start, we actually won't start trying until the 2nd year of school, that way I'm done when we start trying.

I know it's smart, but it tears at my heart. I know we have to see how it goes... but still...

~Shannon

Question #30

30. After a month of infertility talk, we need a distraction. Give us a link to one of your favorite non-infertility-sites, or tell us about your favorite distraction activity/book/feel-good movie.

Shannon:

A few things... I've recently discovered Pinterest and will spend ALL day looking up potential craft products (some that I might even be able to sell on my Etsy site!). I also crochet (as you can see on etsy) and I like to read and my hubs recently bought me a Kindle and my mom introduced me to Kindle on the Cheap and I found Kindle Hearts on Facebook. Those two fan sites will update with FREE or CHEAP/Discounted books EVERY DAY!!! SO AWESOME!

Question #29

29. Tell us about a friendship you lost or a relationship that changed for the worse because of infertility.

Shannon:

I haven't lost or worsened any friendships or relationships. I don't have that many friends anyway, and the ones I do are kind enough to listen and sympathize. Any issues I had with family members due to their fertility success vs my infertility was resolved afterwards.

Steph:

None of my friendships really changed for the worst... Everyone that has done or said anything to get to me is family so I'm stuck with them lol

Ashley:
My relationships have grown with different people in different ways. I'd say for those people who are interested and empathize those relationships have grown. Those friends who just think I need to relax or that it will come in time (like its not a big deal and don't have any clue about the emotions and toll it takes on us) I've become a little more distant or tend to pull away but not significant way.
Three relationships that stand out:
1. My sister (only sibling): we told her and her husband Nov. 2010, she got pregnant Sept. 2011, since she's been pregnant I feel like its hard for her and hard for me so she's cautious what she says around me for the most part, but its because she's being courteous. We've never had the closest relationship but I have been hoping for a long time when she got pregnant that would strengthen our relationship (because I've always wanted to be pregnant she has not) but because I'm struggling with this, it hasn't changed our relationship much. I do have more respect for her now because of the way she's handled things through this time.
2. Friend: She found out she was pregnant right when I was diagnosed. She believes it will happen to us, we just need to relax and it will come in time. (when she's probably going to get pregnant with her second child soon) When we get together with a group she always seems to say stuff about it that makes me resent her. She is a little self absorbed.
3. My Grandmother: She is a person who is sweet and carrying but also wrapped up in herself. Since we've told her she has been a total different person than I've ever known. She truly empathizes for us, prays for us and thinks of us daily. She has been so thoughtful I just am amazed, and it has made our relationship grow immensely.

Question #28

28. Have you ever done something “non-traditional” in order to help you conceive?

Shannon:

I haven't tried anything other than the Vitex vitamin. I do want to try acupuncture, although it terrifies me, fertility massage, and a chiropractic visit. One day :)

Mrs Red:

A Mexican tea blend. It was super complicated, had a special pot, you never drained the pot, just added more water to equal a liter, more leaves and boiled every morning. It tasted disgusting and had. Very distinct smell. And it didn't work. I had to rub belladonna and apple *something Spanish* cream on my stomach every morning for 2 weeks. It was very complicated and didnt work at all. But it appeased my MIL.

Ashley:
I have tried a Chiropractor for a short while, but she really made me mad after a month when she questioned if I was sure I was ready to do IVF because I'm young and could have multiples, etc. I haven't gone back since. I felt like it made me feel better but I don't think it really would affect my infertility.

Question #27

27. If you had known that you would have trouble conceiving, what would you have done differently in life? If you already knew, did that knowledge affect your other life choices?

Shannon:

I would have hoped to catch this sooner before it progressed as far as it has. Granted, I found out at 21, so it wasn't very late in the process. I do wish that I had stayed in college and gotten that out of the way. By now I would have a great paying job and be able to afford the treatments. Not waiting for more treatments after schooling is half way through :/

Mrs Red:

I probably would have been a lot more careful with credit debt, stayed off of birth control (I think it made it worse), and gone to an RE right away.


Ashley:
I would have tried much harder to get pregnant in the first three months after coming off birth control pills, and I would have went to a RE right away instead of wasting a whole year with my GYN doing metformin for 9 months (which didn't help me at all) and clomid for 3 (didn't work). I think if I would have known before I got married it could have changed things for the worse - I often feel guilty I'm putting my husband through this. So I'm glad we found out after we were married.

Question #26

26. What do you use the “nursery” for right now? If you already had a baby, what did you use it for before pregnancy?

Shannon:

Ugh. I don't even want to talk about that room... But I will. We have a 3 bedroom house. Master, guest, and game/computer/craft room. Back in August my MIL decided to move herself in... And has been staying in the guest room. I have it planned out how I want to decorate it and where I want to put all the furniture. Right now I don't go in there.

Mrs Red:

We bought a 3 bedroom house with a den. We bought it with plans to have a nursery and a den then convert the den to a room and make the 3rd bedroom a den. Confusing yes I know, but I don't like that the 3rd room is soooo far from the master in the front of the house. So anyways...
The future nursery has been soooooo many things since beginning to ttc... First it was storage, then it was a guest room, then a gym, then a guest room again, then a plant starting room (we have a veggie garden) then our room (we moved our bed in when we went on vacation for the houses sitter to have somewhere to sleep), and now it is a plant starting/craft/ironing room. LoL we change it up a lot. I'm just waiting for the day that it's just a nursery/kids room

Bracelet Giveaway!

Visitors don't forget to follow us (click the link on top left) and the first 25 will be entered to win a FREE PCOS bracelet!

"Surprise!..."

When you are struggling with fertility, there are a few things that you dread hearing. And the list is long.

However, I'm going to talk about pregnancy announcements from other people.

I've had a few in this journey (I don't know many people having kids yet). Some expected, some not.

We will start with September 2009.
I was at work at my data entry/callcenter job. You aren't supposed to have your phone but I also have mine tucked into a drawer where I can barely see it incase of an emergency. I get a text from my husband's ex-stepsister. It reads the following: "We're pregnant after only a month of trying!" That sent me to the bathroom to cry a bit. I congratulated her.... She eventually told me it was a mass text and she was trying to shove it in her family's faces. We saw them a couple times throughout the pregnancy and they stayed over a night or two. A week after their son was born, we went to see him. He was cute. I didn't cry. Hubs couldn't hold him. Said it was too hard on him. It took him MONTHS to hold him. As in FOUR months.

Fast forward to August 2010.
I went to dinner with a friend because I was expecting a pregnancy announcement from the SIL. During the meal I got an email from a cousin with an "It's a Girl!" announcement... SUPRISE! That hit but since I rarely saw them it wasn't drastic. I was just surprised that I knew I would get a pregnancy announcement, even though it wasn't from the one I was expecting.

September 2010-Infertile Couple's Luck!
A couple that we knew that had been struggling to get pregnant for the last 2 years was pregnant!!! Yay!!! Their announcement didn't bother me. They had struggled. I felt so happy that what they had waited for for SOOO long was finally happening!

October 2010.
It was evening time and I was on the treadmill while hubs was at work. This was before I would go with him any time I had open and help. I had 45 minutes down, 15 left... And I got a text. "We're pregnant! Finally". Yes... Finally... because trying for 1-2 months is FOREVER to wait. Hubs called to make sure I was ok. I was still calm and on the treadmill. Ended up going 15 minutes longer than my goal... Then went in the guest/future nursery and cried. Then I felt stupid crying for myself and pulled it together. When Hubs came home I tried to act normal but he sees right through that and he just held me while I cried. We both took the next day off and made a step towards going to the RE that was recommended to us. Over the next 6 months we hung out and I got to watch her belly grow and tried to be friend's and go walking with her and to the mall. I remember crying at Christmas over the dinner prayer because I saw her husband holding her with his hands on her belly and I felt like a complete and utter failure. That is a story for another time. As is the following in April 2010 when Max was born at 28 weeks (she was in hospital for 6 weeks) and passed the following morning from an infection.


November 2011-Birthday Announcement
I had been very observant since about August. I had figured that with the 6 month standard wait period that the SIL would be trying again. And our A/C had gone out in August and I saw a used pregnancy box in their garage when they let us stay the night. Early/middle of November she mentioned that they were only having sex when she was ovulating. Then they went on vacation. Thanksgiving I noticed that her husband said, quietly, "already got that brain" when she forgot something. I was the only one nearby. Her birthday dinner was that weekend and I noticed that she had a glass of wine but barely drank half in a two hour period. NOT like her at all. They decided to play "telephone" to make the announcement that she was pregnant again. Having expected it, I was happy for them. The week after New Year's 2012 she had a miscarriage.

There is a word of advice to either give friend's or to keep in mind: If you need to make a pregnancy announcement, try to keep in mind those that have struggled and break it to them nicely and privately. Even if by text. Sometimes wording can make ALL the difference. As can a heads up. That way you can get the appropriate happy reaction!

~Shannon

Question #25

25. Talk about a time when you made someone in your life understand more about infertility.

Shannon:

I'll talk to anyone that listens about it. I've gotten better and to the point where I don't cry every time. I couldn't list one specific time though. Most of the time they look like they don't want to talk about it and aren't paying attention... Oh well. The least I can do is try to spread the word!

Mrs Red:

I talk about it all the time. My co workers are probably tired of hearing it but I try to spread the word everywhere and make sure people are educated so that thy can learn to be more sensitive, I talk about it to anyone who will listen. I don't just spring it on people but I try to bring it up when it seems someone can be better educated, or when they ask why I don't have children.

Ashley:
I also talk to everyone about it. I talk to family, friends, patients and strangers. I try to educate when the subject comes up. Or if someone asks if I have kids I usually say no, we struggle with infertility...and go on and talk more about it. I don't just go around talking about it but make sure I talk about it when appropriate and don't just let the moment pass by. Its amazing how many people struggle with infertility and how many people have NO CLUE about it.

Question #24

24. How has your financial situation affected your infertility journey?

Shannon:

Fertility treatments can get expensive, especially if you are referred to an RE. When you find out the clomid treatments are $1000 (including sonos)... That is a LOT of money. Not in the long run, I know. And definitely not the most expensive. But that would be EVERY MONTH of treatment. We have a hard time saving it up. Usually when we get close, something else comes up!

Mrs Red:

My hubby and I had a bad habit before marriage of putting everything on credit so we have a mountain of credit debt, plus now a mortgage... So most of our money goes to that. When I worked for a mutual fund company my insurance didn't cover it and we weren't all for paying out of pocket. I ended up quitting my job of 7 years and stayed out of work for 5 months getting out of depression and trying to 'just relax and get pregnant' didn't work. So I started working again and we realized when we switched insurances to my hubby's his work covered infertility treatments!!! So we started them because even if we didn't have much spare money, it was ok because the insurance covered a lot of it. I have been very blessed with my new job because it affords us to pay down our debt without acquiring more and still do treatments. We have only done 3 rounds of iui but it's still a lot even with insurance. We are waiting to pay down more debt before we plunge into ivf this summer. Let's pray we can continue on that path incase our healthier lifestyle change doesn't bring us a baby :-)



Ashley:
Unfortunately I feel this whole journey is driven by finances and will power. We pay everything out of pocket and I'm not sure how but we have found some way to move forward without taking much time off between treatments. My husband owns a business with a business partner and the business does very well but they don't draw much of a wage because they want to pay everything off as soon as possible (which I understand because they are starting their 4 year) but it does get frustrating going through this journey because I feel like if we were a "normal" household with two incomes we could have done things a little quicker & less stressful financially. We've used the money that he makes to pay for our fertility treatments since we usually live off of my income for everything else. So for the most part it has worked out. We are just starting IVF in which we did have to barrow a small portion of the amount, which has been the first time we've had to do that. We do not like debt and the only debt we have is our home, business and now $5500 for IVF. That also helps keep my stress level down.

AF has ARRIVED

Gotta love when the Provera ends and then you wait....

But, couple days later AF showed up. Now to let 10 months of no AF get out of my system.

BC is to start on Sunday.

~Shannon