Friday, February 10, 2012

Question #27

27. If you had known that you would have trouble conceiving, what would you have done differently in life? If you already knew, did that knowledge affect your other life choices?

Shannon:
I would have hoped to catch this sooner before it progressed as far as it has. Granted, I found out at 21, so it wasn't very late in the process. I do wish that I had stayed in college and gotten that out of the way. By now I would have a great paying job and be able to afford the treatments. Not waiting for more treatments after schooling is half way through :/

Mrs Red:

I probably would have been a lot more careful with credit debt, stayed off of birth control (I think it made it worse), and gone to an RE right away.


Ashley:
I would have tried much harder to get pregnant in the first three months after coming off birth control pills, and I would have went to a RE right away instead of wasting a whole year with my GYN doing metformin for 9 months (which didn't help me at all) and clomid for 3 (didn't work). I think if I would have known before I got married it could have changed things for the worse - I often feel guilty I'm putting my husband through this. So I'm glad we found out after we were married.

3 comments:

  1. Hi guys,

    I stumbled upon your blog after searching for info on PCOS. Doctors suspected I had it when I was 15, but I was recently told that I probably won't ever have children. (I was told a year ago and I am 23 now). My story is a lot different from yours since I am not trying to conceive, but I still feel for each one of you. You are all strong, beautiful women, and I am immensely enjoying reading your blog as it lets me know I'm not alone.

    What really made me want to comment, is what Ashley said about feeling guilty that she's putting her husband through this. I'm single right now, but knowing that I won't be able to have children (not as easily as others at least) is something that weighs down on my mind. Who's going to want to have a relationship with someone who can't provide them with a family? Around the time I found out about the infertility, I was seeing someone. We weren't anywhere near marriage, but things were getting a little serious. When I got the news, I couldn't decide whether I wanted to tell him or not. Finally, at the encouragement of friends, I did. He seemed a little taken aback, but said he understood. Then he said, "Don't worry about it. We can just keep doing what we're doing now and when we decide we're ready to settle down and start a family, we can go our own ways." Needless to say, this killed me more than I care to admit. I left him and haven't seen anyone since.

    People keep telling me I'm young and that things will happen eventually, but it's hard. Anyway, I'm sorry for rambling. I just really wanted to say thanks for sharing your own experiences and I look forward to learning and growing with you all.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much for your comment!

      I have to admit, my jaw dropped at the response you BF gave you when you told him.

      I was fortunate to find out after I was married and luckily he is very understanding.

      If you are ever interested in writing a guest post, let us know!

      Delete
  2. Thank you so much for writing! I am young too and people make the same comment to me..t things will work out eventually. They don't have a clue. Hello this is a medical condition some thing I have to live with for the rest of my life. Not only does it make me struggle with infertility but numerous other health problems both physical and mental. I say...educate people :)

    The part about finding someone who wants you...you will. I found out that I had PCOS one month after I got married. I told my husband several times that I wish I would have known before we were married cuz I wouldn't have married him because I didn't want to put him through this. Of course I would have still wanted to marry him. His response from the very beginning is I really want to have a family but I want you more and I married YOU. You may have been told you can't have kids but that's "naturally" & neither can I but you & I both should be able to with help. Or if your a person who doesn't care about being pregnant then you can do adoption right away. Just because you will have a harder time naturally having a family doesn't change your mind about having one. The person that you're meant to be with will love you for you and will help you through your journey of having a family.

    P.S. A friend of mine just got engaged and she has known she's had pcos since she was 16 she just told her fiance when they were dating & talked about having kids that she has the condition but she still really wants a family so they'll have to work harder at it or adopt. She would really like to adopt. And he really wants kids too and is completely fine with whatever they have to do.

    Good luck you'll find him. It was really nice to hear from you.

    ReplyDelete

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