I cant believe I haven't posted this yet. I have to constantly remind myself of this daily, but God is faithful. I will one day have an awesome testimony to share =D
So as a human , I'm not perfect but each day I aim to be more what God wants me to be and do what God would have me to do. I often fail but he is so forgiving and he pulls me right back up unto his arms. Anyways sometimes being human, (and female lol), my emotions just get the best of me. I've been scared of the possibility not having a child because of a number of different things. My mom lost a baby to spinobefida, my grandma couldnt have a baby until after she was 30, my sister had miscarriages and lost a baby after birth (this is a complicated story), my aunt had trouble conceiving, alot of my family has endometrosis, my cycles are way out of whack all the time, and much much more (including generational curses, possibility of symptoms of different female problems and more). However I in no way claim any of these, and I speaking healing into these circumstance and I firmly believe and know that I have broke these curses and illness in the name of Jesus. Me being human, I have my flaws. Sometimes its hard for me to sit back and watch all these people get pregnant (especially people who complain about being a mother!) all the time, where I sometimes feel like it would never happen for me. I was feeling really upset back in June and having a hard time dealing with these.This all took place on June 6th, the birthday of my sisters baby who didn't make it, Hannah (keep note of this!) I was praying real hard and God spoke to me to read 1 Samuel. Now I have never been good at memorizing scripture (which I feel horrible for and continue to work on =() So, I didnt know what the story that 1 Samuel held. 1 Samuel is about Hannah (way more than a coincidence!) being barren and she poured her heart out to God. She asked God that if He give her a son, she promised to give Him back to the Lord. God opened her womb and she gave birth to a son, who she called Samuel meaning, "because I asked the Lord for Him". On that same day I also read about how Leah named one of her sons Judah, meaning "she praised the Lord". I felt a huge peace come over me when I read all of this , and I just bawled my eyes out thanking God. I know this was Gods promise to me, that I will one day have a child. The day I have a son, his name will be Judah Samuel I thank God so much for his lovingness,faithfulness,kindess,forgivingness, and so much more. He did not have to save me but he did. He didnt not have to take me back after mistakes, but he did. He did not have to give me a promise of something this big, but he did. He deserves (and always has!) the glory and praise and so much more. Im so not worthy of all of this, but his love is unconditonal with an agape love. Thank you lord for your promises. Thank you for all you do! Remember there is hope. Im standing in faith of my miracle to one day occur. Thank you so much heavenly father!
Showing posts with label endometriosis. Show all posts
Showing posts with label endometriosis. Show all posts
Sunday, December 9, 2012
Saturday, September 1, 2012
Introducing Sheila!
We have added a new blogger to our group. Again, we are still taking more writers, just email me at sivywright@gmail.com with you email information.
Here is a little background that Sheila wrote for you guys:::
I am 23 years old (I know, still kind of young) and my husband and I have been married since August of 2008. My husband is 25. I went off birth control and have been TTC since October of 08. I technically haven't been diagnosed with infertility yet out of fear of going to the doctor (I realize now that was a very stupid mistake and I have my first appointment the 17th). I have very irregular periods and many female problems. My family history doesn't help, my mom had cancer and died when I was 15 years old. The cancer was very rare, but it is said it can be hereditary. Almost every woman on my moms side has or has had endometriosis, suffered through miscarriage and has had a hard time conceiving. Both my sister and my mother have lost full term babies (my niece due to my sister having von willibrand disease and other complications, and my moms baby (my sister) having spinobefida. My aunt (my mom's sister) tried for many years before she got pregnant with
my cousin and my grandma was said to be a twin but the twin didn't make it. My grandma on my dads side tried to get pregnant with my dad for nearly 15 years and finally had my dad when she was 34. My mother in law has thyroid complications and I carry a lot of the same symptoms. I also researched and have a lot of symptoms of PCOS. So needless to say, I will not be surprised by anything the doctors may find. Although I can't bring forth a lot of answers to people right now due to not knowing myself, I will always be there to support anybody through anything they may be struggling with. Thank you for letting me be a part of the group with open arms =)
Here is a little background that Sheila wrote for you guys:::
I am 23 years old (I know, still kind of young) and my husband and I have been married since August of 2008. My husband is 25. I went off birth control and have been TTC since October of 08. I technically haven't been diagnosed with infertility yet out of fear of going to the doctor (I realize now that was a very stupid mistake and I have my first appointment the 17th). I have very irregular periods and many female problems. My family history doesn't help, my mom had cancer and died when I was 15 years old. The cancer was very rare, but it is said it can be hereditary. Almost every woman on my moms side has or has had endometriosis, suffered through miscarriage and has had a hard time conceiving. Both my sister and my mother have lost full term babies (my niece due to my sister having von willibrand disease and other complications, and my moms baby (my sister) having spinobefida. My aunt (my mom's sister) tried for many years before she got pregnant with
my cousin and my grandma was said to be a twin but the twin didn't make it. My grandma on my dads side tried to get pregnant with my dad for nearly 15 years and finally had my dad when she was 34. My mother in law has thyroid complications and I carry a lot of the same symptoms. I also researched and have a lot of symptoms of PCOS. So needless to say, I will not be surprised by anything the doctors may find. Although I can't bring forth a lot of answers to people right now due to not knowing myself, I will always be there to support anybody through anything they may be struggling with. Thank you for letting me be a part of the group with open arms =)
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
Surgeries
So I had 2 surgeries in one year...
March 2010- ovarian drilling and cyst removal
I had been asking Dr3 to remove cysts because everyone said it would help but he kept saying no, it doesn't help, it's a waste of time and the recovery is rough blah blah blah... When he gave up on me, my SIL-1 had a surgery for ovarian drilling. So I said hmmmmm and looked into it. I had been feeling like my gyn wasn't doing enough for me so I found another doctor with the woman's clinic with the hospital group I wanted to deliver with one day anyway so I switched. Told him of the pains I get and he did some sonograms and then suggested the surgery if I was interested! Got the surgery a month later in march a week before my moms hysterectomy with the same doctor. Got the surgery, he made holes and said he removed half of my cysts and cleaned up a little bit of endometriosis but said it wasn't much. Then he said I could give it 6 months before trying treatments or jump right in. So we tried to see if thigs would work out on their own. It seemed like it because I got my AF every 32-36 days May, June, July and then... August happened... Well lemme back up, I threw up every day for my June and July cycles... In July I was visiting my SIL-1 who had just moved to Washington dc 6 weeks after having her miracle baby in April. Anyway I get back from DC and shortly after my July cycle 'ended' at the end of July, then I got my August one... Weird... Then it wouldn't stop... 6 weeks! I called the doctor and he saw me and gave me provera and said i needed to go to an RE... I was so happy it looked like I was normalizing and then boom there goes that happy... No more cycle... My other SIL (SIL-2) was pregnant and due in December and nothing make u question your own childless state like a baby shower you are obligated to attend... I started looking into my husbands insurance because we had just changed insurances in June since I quit my job (too much stress) and realized OMG we have infertility coverage!!!
December 2010- surgery number 2, laparoscopy/uterine polyp removal
So we went to a fertility doctor in November right before our anniversary. Well while we were in the middle of our fertility treatments round 1, they said it looked like I had polyup/scar tissue/possible tumor growth in my uterus and a pregnancy would probably end in a miscarriage and advised we stop the cycle and have surgery and resume after they results. I was devastated because earlier in the ear I had a skin cancer scare! (wear sunscreen kids!) surgery was 2 days before Christmas! merry Christmas... Surgery went good, tissue was benign and probably caused by my miscarriage the year before. So I healed up, was on BC for a month and could continue treatments with my February cycle (6wks after surgery)
These made surgery numbers 10 and 11 I think my next one is free ;-)
(5 sinus surgeries 2 knee 1 foot and a gall bladder)
-Mrs Red
March 2010- ovarian drilling and cyst removal
I had been asking Dr3 to remove cysts because everyone said it would help but he kept saying no, it doesn't help, it's a waste of time and the recovery is rough blah blah blah... When he gave up on me, my SIL-1 had a surgery for ovarian drilling. So I said hmmmmm and looked into it. I had been feeling like my gyn wasn't doing enough for me so I found another doctor with the woman's clinic with the hospital group I wanted to deliver with one day anyway so I switched. Told him of the pains I get and he did some sonograms and then suggested the surgery if I was interested! Got the surgery a month later in march a week before my moms hysterectomy with the same doctor. Got the surgery, he made holes and said he removed half of my cysts and cleaned up a little bit of endometriosis but said it wasn't much. Then he said I could give it 6 months before trying treatments or jump right in. So we tried to see if thigs would work out on their own. It seemed like it because I got my AF every 32-36 days May, June, July and then... August happened... Well lemme back up, I threw up every day for my June and July cycles... In July I was visiting my SIL-1 who had just moved to Washington dc 6 weeks after having her miracle baby in April. Anyway I get back from DC and shortly after my July cycle 'ended' at the end of July, then I got my August one... Weird... Then it wouldn't stop... 6 weeks! I called the doctor and he saw me and gave me provera and said i needed to go to an RE... I was so happy it looked like I was normalizing and then boom there goes that happy... No more cycle... My other SIL (SIL-2) was pregnant and due in December and nothing make u question your own childless state like a baby shower you are obligated to attend... I started looking into my husbands insurance because we had just changed insurances in June since I quit my job (too much stress) and realized OMG we have infertility coverage!!!
December 2010- surgery number 2, laparoscopy/uterine polyp removal
So we went to a fertility doctor in November right before our anniversary. Well while we were in the middle of our fertility treatments round 1, they said it looked like I had polyup/scar tissue/possible tumor growth in my uterus and a pregnancy would probably end in a miscarriage and advised we stop the cycle and have surgery and resume after they results. I was devastated because earlier in the ear I had a skin cancer scare! (wear sunscreen kids!) surgery was 2 days before Christmas! merry Christmas... Surgery went good, tissue was benign and probably caused by my miscarriage the year before. So I healed up, was on BC for a month and could continue treatments with my February cycle (6wks after surgery)
These made surgery numbers 10 and 11 I think my next one is free ;-)
(5 sinus surgeries 2 knee 1 foot and a gall bladder)
-Mrs Red
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Mrs Red's story
Well my first visit from the angry aunt was when I was about 11, I didn't know it was it because it wasn't much but I was sooooooo sick and cramping like crazy for a whole 2 months after. It was in the summer time so I didn't complain too much then I got a crazy visit... Then I had semi regular cycles but everytime it would come I'd have to miss school because it was so heavy and I was so sick. Then one day around 14 it stopped coming regularly... My mom took me to the doctor and they gave me birth control to regulate it. I took it for 3 months at a time until I was about 16, then they recommended I just keep taking it since they weren't regulating with the 3 month tries. Right before I turned 18 I didn't have a cycle for months. My mom took me to the doctor because she thought I was pregnant... I had a boyfriend, who I ended up marrying 4 years later but no I wasn't pregnant. They told me in march of 2002 I possibly had endometriosis and maybe PCOS. This was the base doctors so they did a half butt job diagnosing me. Thy recommended I go back on BC and I told my mom what's the point? I didn't need it and if I wasn't going to have a cycle why stress about a little pill? So I went off.
I met my husband February 2002 while we were working together at the grocery store. I had a HUGE crush on him the minute I saw him. Apparently we had been working together since September but I never noticed... He was a good Christian boy and just a few weeks before I had just accepted Jesus into my life. We talked when we worked together and I old my friends at school how cute he was. Then in march I saw him on my way to work at the end of my street unloading chairs off a truck. later that day he walked into the store with his dad and uncle and I asked him who's house that was and he said it was his parents! So we talked and at the end of April we were bf/gf. We dated until February 2006 when we got engaged. We never lived together the whole time we were dating and decided to keep it that way til we for married. In march we started building our first house. In September I moved into his house because his family believes you live with your parents until you are married and mine were more... You are driving us nuts move out! Lol I actually have a better relationship with my parents not living with them. Anyway we had a short engagement and got married in November. No, not because I was pregnant, but because we were both ready to start a family.
As soon as we got married we were trying to start a family. I went to a doctor in may and there started alllllllll my lovely fertility treatments. I'll go into those on separate posts but it has been a long bumpy emotional rollercoaster and I do not wish it on ANYONE! Anyone suffering with it that wishes it on someone else has some serious issues to work on. I am however semi thankful that I am not alone in this and that there are others going through it. Support is the best key to get through this. So is humor.so I laugh I cry and I go about it day by day hoping one day I will have my own little snot nosed little squirmy bundle of joy :-)
I met my husband February 2002 while we were working together at the grocery store. I had a HUGE crush on him the minute I saw him. Apparently we had been working together since September but I never noticed... He was a good Christian boy and just a few weeks before I had just accepted Jesus into my life. We talked when we worked together and I old my friends at school how cute he was. Then in march I saw him on my way to work at the end of my street unloading chairs off a truck. later that day he walked into the store with his dad and uncle and I asked him who's house that was and he said it was his parents! So we talked and at the end of April we were bf/gf. We dated until February 2006 when we got engaged. We never lived together the whole time we were dating and decided to keep it that way til we for married. In march we started building our first house. In September I moved into his house because his family believes you live with your parents until you are married and mine were more... You are driving us nuts move out! Lol I actually have a better relationship with my parents not living with them. Anyway we had a short engagement and got married in November. No, not because I was pregnant, but because we were both ready to start a family.
As soon as we got married we were trying to start a family. I went to a doctor in may and there started alllllllll my lovely fertility treatments. I'll go into those on separate posts but it has been a long bumpy emotional rollercoaster and I do not wish it on ANYONE! Anyone suffering with it that wishes it on someone else has some serious issues to work on. I am however semi thankful that I am not alone in this and that there are others going through it. Support is the best key to get through this. So is humor.so I laugh I cry and I go about it day by day hoping one day I will have my own little snot nosed little squirmy bundle of joy :-)
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