Guest post: Cherish's Journey

DH and I meet at work while in our 30’s. We dated a year, were engaged for a year, and we waited a year to start TTC. When I was 34 we started TTC. My OBGYN said it could take a few months to a year. Well, we got lucky on the first try. That October we got our ANGEL!!! DS is now 6! Well, we decided to TTC for the 2nd kiddo when DS was about 3. I went in to my Wonderful OBGYN and said “Want a little girl born in the spring!” She laughed. I was confused and SERIOUS when I said; we got a boy born in the fall. What’s the problem? Well after a couple rounds of Clomid, she sent me to HER RE. I did some research and Dr. Chantilis is one of the BEST in Texas. His staff is SO nice! I was in love with him! Our first appointment was very promising. He did some tests, did a sono and told us that he would have us pregnant in a matter of months. He would be surprised if it would take more than 3. Wellllllllll. We did Clomid and trigger shots and NOTHING happened. He did more blood work. He had already diagnosed me with PCOS. The tests came back NOT good. He said we might not be able to get pregnant and might consider using an egg donor. I told him he was crazy. We tried some other medicines and then he ran more tests. I don’t remember the details or the Medical jargon but the tests were I had Pre-Ovarian Failure. My results were extremely high. One was Off the chart. Seriously were NOT even Registering! I was BROKEN!! The problem was ALL ME! I curled up for 2 days and cried. DH was so supportive. My sister was visiting and she and DH took care of me and DS. A few weeks later we decided to go the egg donor route. So we decided on one!! She was awesome!! THEN someone we knew had a pregnant friend come to her considering putting her babies (that’s right, twins. Boy and Girl TWINS!) up for adoption. We put the egg donor on hold. Plus it was around Thanksgiving and the holidays were hard enough as it was. Well, she kept the babies and then our egg donor got pregnant. We were back to square one. We found another egg donor and proceeded! March was the Time! The egg donor did GREAT. We ended up with THREE embryos. We transferred 2 and got pregnant. I was Pregnant on my 40th Birthday! I was SO HAPPY!!!! THEN on week 6, I had a miscarriage. We lost the baby. I was heartbroken. We still had one viable embryo. We had nothing to lose. That didn’t take. We had to take out a HUGE loan (that we are still paying on) and no baby. If I EVER have to pee on another stick I will probably go Postal! The heartbreak EACH time of seeing the negative result, the years of trying and not getting pregnant and the loss of the baby I only had for a few weeks is was the hardest thing I have ever lived thru. THEN we fell in love with a little baby boy............................. A WHOLE new roller coaster ride in a different park! ADOPTION!!